Please PRAY!!!

Hello, ALL!!

I know it's been 2 months since I last blogged. Not even going to get into the craziness that is my life right now or the ridiculous MISTAKE of changing internet providers and the horrible drama that was for OVER A MONTH--just wanted to get back to blogging somehow and ask you all to pray for me and my family.

I'm in Amarillo tonight. Coby and I planned to drive in from his grandparents after our Christmas celebration with his family to see my grandparents. I tried to call my grandma this morning and no one answered the phone--when we arrived no one was home. After getting in touch with my uncle, I discovered she had been admitted to hospice care at the hospital and things don't look good. I knew she was doing poorly and had home health care come out to help her and my ailing grandfather, but I had no idea she was as sick as she is--apparently it is even a shock to her nurses. The hospice people said she's got not only the emphazema but also pulminary hypertension working against her. Her lungs are just done working. She's at 80% oxygen saturation tonight and in and out--not always comprehending what we are saying and not talking hardly at all. I think she has very little time left.

I chose to stay in town for a few days and sent Coby home with Skyler. Please pray for peace for my grandparents, God's perfect timing in taking her home, and an easy day tomorrow for Chloe Grace as she's with me here and the hospital is a hard place for a baby. Pray also for my uncle--he lost my dad eight years ago, his dad a few years ago, and his wife just five months ago. My grandma is all he has left of family and he's super sad.

I don't think it's a coincidence that I am here in this moment and that her health plummetted this weekend of all weekends. I would also ask that you would pray God would use me to minister to my family in a mighty way. It's kind of an uncomfortable situation, one that was TOTALLY unexpected, and my sweet grandpa is beside himself because of this--he doesn't want to lose her and needs to be able to let go.

So sad--thanks for your prayers. I love all my sisters who lift me up!! Blessings!!

She has emphazema and been on oxygen for a long time, but she's be

I've Been Tagged!!!

My friend Dona tagged me, and so I will now oblige...

This is a picture of me during a baby shower thrown for me by my Enrichment Hour class the year I was pregnant with Skyler. How cute am I??? They did good to bring decorations, as seen, and the tiara I'm wearing is now the tiara Skyler wears on her birthday every year.

This is Skyler at 1 year. Cute, isn't she!!?? I actually did have her wear it on the morning of her birthday when she was two and we didn't even have her at our house when she was three (she was at Poppie and Gibbie's), but I should have taken pictures. I'm the queen of not getting the picture when I need it. I need lessons from my sister-in-law!!! Anyhoo, it's my goal for her to wear it as many years as I can possibly convince her to. I want it to be tradition!!! :)

So for this tag....

1. Open your pictures folder.

2. Go to the sixth folder.

3. Open the sixth picture.

4. Import into your blog and tell the story.

I, too, will tag the first five on my blog list, so Adriana, Amy, Angela, (not Dona), Emily, and Jaime, you're it!!!

Again

It happening again this year...

Last night was the first night of many to follow that I had a dream about my dad. It is the same recurring dream. He is still alive, having recovered from cancer, only to pull me aside and tell me that it has returned. What does this mean? Why can't I dream of him in heaven, whole, and exactly like he was before that curse of a disease? Why is he healed and then sick again? Maybe this is just another step of the grieving process--maybe it's just reflection. I don't know. It's sad, though, and it makes me miss him. It makes me remember and wonder and sigh. October is such a hard month for me still.

Daddy, I can't wait to see you in heaven some day. I love you.

Um...

Let me just say that accountability is good. I like it. I APPRECIATE IT!! But THREATS are just not nice!!! :) A dear friend, who shall remain nameless, gave me the good kick in the pants I needed last night with a straightforward threat that if I didn't start blogging again, I'd be REMOVED from her list of links on her blog. I'm hurt a little, but it's a good kind of hurt.

I mean, I haven't blogged since July 2nd for crying out loud. Granted, I've had a baby, started working again, married off a sister, gone on vacation, handled a few family crises, and lived "normal" life with two children (which, by the way, is exponentially more work than one kid), but really, who doesn't have the same obligations in her life? You all are such consistent bloggers, and I appreciate you. I must admit I've been quite overwhelmed at my life, but excuses are worthless. I love doing this--I just have to find the time.

So my question....are you still there? If you think my efforts are worth it, will you please leave me some encouragement? I know it's kind of selfish, but it honestly helps me when I have comments. Pitiful, isn't it. My goal is to blog for the sake of blogging, even if no one reads it, but I do love to be read. I think most bloggers do, or they wouldn't even do it in the first place.

SO I ramble. Leave me a comment. I leave you with a picture that depicts my life right now. CRAZY!!!! :)

Life in the Making

Birthday...

Getting ready to go home from the hospital...

Two and a half weeks old...

Five Weeks Old...

Skyler taking a nap with the leopard at the zoo...

A trip to the Arboretum...

Taking our first swim...

Sorry some of these pictures are backwards. I've tried and tried to fix them. They look fine on my computer, but don't transfer into Blogger the right way. Oh well. :) And for those of you who were waiting for these, my internet was down for TWO DAYS!!! Technology!!!

Introducing...

Chloe Grace Selke

Born May 19, 2007 at 12:47 p.m. 8 lbs. 5 oz., 21 inches long. And to think I thought she'd be smaller than her sister! :) More updates to come, hopefully with more pictures.

Those Little Life Moments

Thursday morning I woke up just needing to be held. I wasn't sad or frustrated or overwhelmed, I just needed cuddle time. Coby was in the living room on the couch and so I went in to lay beside him.

There are those moments in your life that for whatever reason leave a lasting impression on you--those moments that are so deep and full of meaning, even though they are so very simple.

Chloe Grace hasn't made much in the way of headlines on my blog yet. Understandably so, she's still in utero and although she does have a personality to me as I am the one carrying her, she is still a bit distant in the way of personal relationships for the time being with her dad, her sister, her family. It's only natural! :) So to describe Chloe Grace to you, let me say that she is a free-mover. She is not restricted or restrained in her movements. I often feel her little hands and feet glide across my belly in one big, huge, swelling motion. She seems to be more laid back than her sister was at this point in development, and obviously a little more content--she's still inside, rather than outside, UNLIKE her sister at her age. Another fascinating thing about her is that she seems to "communicate" to you through movements. As I rub my hand over my belly, I often feel a little nudge and then she'll follow my motion with her little hand or foot. Almost like she's trying to talk to me without saying a word. I was thinking about this in the car on the way home from shopping the other day. I was dwelling on Skyler and how wordy she is--her grand vocabulary for a three year old, her perceptive way of engaging people, especially grown-ups in conversation--and I was wondering how Chloe Grace might be different. In that moment, I felt God say to me, "Some speak without saying a word." An interesting thought to ponder. I wonder what she'll be like--what she'll have to "say" and how she'll communicate differently from her sister. And as I was sitting on the couch with Coby that morning, I was reminded again of that time in the car on the way home.

As I layed there, Coby wrapped his arm around me and gently rubbed my belly. Chloe Grace began to dance under his hand, following the movements and keeping pace. She seemed to be connecting with him on some awesome level I don't yet understand, and that moment, Mommy, Daddy, and Chloe Grace, forever set itself a place in my mind. I remembered sharing moments like these with Skyler, but being so busy and occupied, we've taken very little time to just sit and appreciate our newest little girl. It's a moment I'll remember for always.

Since then, I think God has been speaking to my heart about the tremendous blessing of my family. Coby is such an amazing dad and husband. The closer we get to this birth, the more he loves me in little ways and big ways. I cannot fathom the grace of God in giving me such a man to walk through life with. He's my complete compliment. He's my soul mate, my greatest supporter, and my dearest friend. Skyler is such a blessing to my life. How I see myself in her and oh, the lessons she is teaching me!! She's a fighter, determined and confident, independent and self-assured. She's my little talker--always full of questions and answers. She's my song bird--rarely is there a moment in her day where a song is not on her lips. How I pray that God burns deep in her being the heart of a true worshipper that longs to follow him all the days of her life!!! And as I am getting ready to meet this new little one--by Monday at the latest--I'm so excited to see more of the awesomeness of the blessing of my heavenly Father. I truly am not worthy, but my God is GOOD!!!

So I will seize the day today because tomorrow will be different. I will love and laugh and play, I will contemplate and relax and renew, and as tomorrow comes, with the cares and trials of its own, I will remember THIS day, and last Thursday, and treasure the moments God gives me.